 | | |
| | |
|
Spaces home  Jimmy Wayuni's WebsitePhotosProfileFriendsMore |  Tools   |
Jimmy Wayuni's WebsiteA Kenyan Musician, a Kenya Revenue Customs officer and a Movie actor.... Likes to share lots of information with friends and business associates... - But I Hate Conmen & Women !!
Issues related to World movies, videos, dvds, etc, Production & Sales...
|
||||||||||||||||||||||||||||
|
|
June, 2008 "Going Back To Muhoho High School...." Muhoho High School is the lovely institution where I started and completed my Four-year secondary school life before joining Njiiri's High School for my Two-year advanced secondary school life.
I joined the school in January 1976 after passing my Primary School exams in Kiamwangi Primary School and left in November 1979 after the Form Four Exams.
The School was established in early '60s after Kenya's Independence and is situated in Gatitu, Kiganjo area of Gatundu District. It is named after the Late Snr. Chief Muhoho Gathecha, father to the Former First-Lady Mama Ngina Kenyatta. It's a famous institution which has excelled over years and managed to produce a good number of prominent personalities in Kenya. It has Classes from Form One to Form Six. I loved the school though after my school life, I found myself associating more with Njiiri's than Muhoho. As such, I never set my foot again in the school ever since I collected both my Academic and Leaving Certificates in January 1980 !!
On 9th June, 2008 I received an invitation from the Head of English/Literature Department of Muhoho High school, Mr. Thuku. He wanted me, as a prominent artist and a former old-boy of the school, to be the Guest Speaker during the Central Province Inter-schools' Drama, Music, Poetry and Oral literature Symposium. The event would take place on Sunday, 15th June, 2008 in the School's main hall. I was supposed to give a lecture on "The Role of a Musician in the Society and the Challenges they face...." This meant that I was GOING BACK TO MUHOHO...!! I felt honoured and excited.
So, I prepared myself nicely and came Sunday, I parked my new BMW at the same spot where my good-old Biology teacher, Mr. Kimanange used to park his bicycle in 1978. I was accompanied by my brother Bjorn Githinji, my cousin Dr.Anthony Kamau and Inooro FM Radio Reporter Mr.Mike Njoroge. We were warmly welcomed by our hosts who also offered us a delicious lunch in the Staff-room. We were then taken round the school to see the changes that had taken place since I left nearly THIRTY YEARS AGO. Here I could see my good-old classrooms(where I had been declared the most noisy but brightest boy) ,our biology lab(where we used to dissect frogs, chameleons, mice and insects), the physics lab( where I first saw and learnt of bunsen-burner, beaker, tripod, glowing-flint, acid, gases, lead, magnet, etc), the dormitory(whose door-step the watchman used to camp permanent to ensure that I did not take in a female student of a visiting school),the agriculture block(..the house of soil, seeds, tubers, garden-tools, manure, animals, ploughs, etc), the bursar's office( where I'd once tricked the bursar into issuing me with a receipt for school-tour fee I had actually NOT paid), the same old dinning hall( where we used to feast on weevil-filled "githeri" and porriage popularly referred to as "gum" or "glue") and a cute well-equipped library which never existed during my days - (lucky these current students, I mummered to myself!).
After the tour, I was taken to the Hall where the students were eagerly and curiously waiting for me. The Hall was filled to capacity. Mr. Thuku introduced me and my colleagues to all those in attendance. Several students gave their rich presentations on musical works, poetry, scene-reciting, tongue-twisters, etc, etc. I found them very original, creative and entertaining.
It was then my turn to speak. I started by giving a brief history/introduction of myself, my former institutions of learning, my various professions(Musician, Movie-actor, Customs Official, Farmer and Businessman). I then moved to the main topic and systematically talked on the Role of a Musician in the society, the Challenges they face and some ways of overcoming those challenges. It took me less than an hour to give the presentation which the teachers and the students commented was clear, understandable and well-researched. Later I sang and performed for them using my audio-cd playback. They all enjoyed and danced with me. It was lovely and fun-filled.
By the time we left (at 6.00pm), I found myself wishing I would get another chance to visit Muhoho High School....
Below Are some of The Day's Photos...
December, 2007 My Japan Trip - December 2007 I arranged to visit Japan on Holiday and business mission in the month of December, 2007. I had'nt expected the Visa process to be any difficult and so I even booked and paid for my Return air ticket with Emirates Airline. However, I was in for a big surprise ! I was to realise that getting a Japanese Travel Visa was TEN TIMES harder than getting an American or British travel Visas !!
Japanese Embassy is located around Upperhill area, just close to British High Commission in Nairobi. I firstly sent a friend of mine to get me Visa Application forms and after I had filled them and attached all other necessary documents, I personally took the forms to the Embassy hoping to get a Travel Visa within a day or two. As I have already said, getting the Visa was not an easy deal and one can easily be tempted to give up. Am sure many Visa-seekers have had to give up. All the same, I got the Visa on 19th December, 2007 after three visits and several phone calls to the Embassy. Thus, I was due for the BIG visit to Japan the following day.
I left Nairobi on 20th December, 2007 aboard Emirates Flight EK720 for Dubai at 1725hrs. From Dubai I connected on Flight EK316 at 0215hrs on 21st Dec. and flew for 12 hours non-stop upto Kansai Int. Airport, Osaka, Japan where I arrived at around 4.30pm (Japan time) and it was already dark!. I went through the normal Immigration and Customs entry procedures after which I was due for my hotel but not before a cute plainclothed-Japanese Policewoman stopped me for routine checks. I was very comfortable with her questions and by the time she was through with me, we were already exchanging contacts as good friends. She even helped find my way to my hotel ! I had been booked at Hotel Sunrise Inn at Kaizuka, just afew kilometres from Kansai Airport. By 7.00pm, I was in my hotel.
That night I slept late at 3.00am but managed to wake up at 7.30am. Weather was too bad, as there were heavy rains accompanied by storms and it was very chilly. I would have hated Japan if I did'nt visit Namba - the main city centre of Osaka. Here I went by use of speed Electric Trains. These Trains move at a speed of Over 120mph and they form the convinient mode of passanger transport. For the next 3 or 4 days, my stay in Japan became enjoyable. Namba, Kyoto and Kobe had became my frequent destinations. I used to leave my hotel very early in the morning only to return back late in the night. Communication with my relatives & friends in Kenya was minimal due to the difference in Time Zone. Japan is 6hrs ahead of Kenya. This gave me time to concentrate on my Japanese business with little to care about Africa.
My main interests were tourism and business. I also tasted Japanese foods, drinks(like Sake), nice life and their rich culture. I saw all that I had seen in movies, TVs and adverts about Japan.. - a really lovely place !! Japan is very clean and attractive. No dust or mud even with all those rains. My shoes remained clean throughout my stay. Electrical switches operate vertically Right - Left unlike ours which operate Up and Down. I found all Japanese people very busy BUT respectful, humble, cheerful and helpful. They never ignore you incase of any enquiry or needs. Japanese girls are generally short and attractive though some have noses like a pig's. Many have no hips (flat behinds) BUT this is compensated with cute-lovely-smooth sporty legs ; very shapely and attractive legs !! Most of them were dressed in long boots, very short skirts and heavy coats. Their bodies are flexible and can move round...all sides - good for gymnastics and martial arts. Apparently, for all the time I stayed in Osaka, I never saw a single black man or woman ! I was a Lone Ranger in this part of Asia. But all in all, I got the best treatment from the Japanese.
I must say that I was one Luck chap to celebrate Year 2007 Christmas in TWO WORLDS. I left Japan on the night of 25th December and I was back in Kenya by the evening of Boxing Day, 26th December, 2007.
God Willing, I shall Be Back....... Not So Long....!!
Long Live Japan, Love Live Japanese People...!!
(View More of My Japanese Trip Photos in The PHOTO ALBUM)
By: Jimmy Wayuni
Nairobi - KENYA.
December, 2007 Jimmy Wayuni's Hot Jokes..!!! What is a KISS?
It's an upper PREPARATION for a lower INVASION that will lead to further PENETRATION with fast ACCELERATION that will build next GENERATION. ================================== What do most men do after sex? 2% eat; 3% smoke cigarettes; 4% take a shower; 5% go to sleep and 86% get up and go back home to their wives. ================================== Why is your cock better than your credit card? Reasons:
(a) Once spent, it recharges itself. (b) It is accepted worldwide. (c) You can let your wife use it as much as she wants. =================================== LITTLE GIRL: Mommy, I just found out that our neighbour's son has a penis like a peanut!!
MUM: You mean it's small? LITTLE GIRL: No it's salty!!! ================================== A recently married couple was happy with the whole thing. Meaning: He was happy with the hole, and she was happy with the thing.
================================== A man was carrying 3 babies in a train. A lady sitting next to him asked: Are they your babies? Man replied: No, I work in a condom factory and these are customers' COMPLAINTS. ================================== Women's top 5 lies: from the whitest, downward... 5. I am a virgin. 4. It is so big. 3. I can't do that to my best friend. 2. I won't gain weight after marriage 1. I am coming! I am coming!!! ================================== A guy goes up to a girl in a bar and says: You want to play magic? She asks: What is that?
He replies: We go Home, screw, and then you disappear !!
================================== What is the closest thing to a woman's periods? ANSWER: Your Salary ! ... -It comes once a month, lasts 4 or 5 days, and if it doesn't come, you are F*CKED!!! ================================== Teacher asked: Which part of the body goes to heaven first? A Kid replied : The legs sir ...,because everynight I see my mum's legs up high while screaming "OH GOD! I'M COMING !! I'M COMING...!!".
================================== Teacher: Why did you bring your cat to school? Pupil : Because I heard my sister's boyfriend say, "TONIGHT I WILL EAT YOUR PUSSY". ================================== What's the difference between a panty and a stage curtain? Answer : When you pull down the stage curtain, the Show
is over, but when you pull down the pantie... the Show begins...! =================================== MUM: Didn't I tell you if a stranger touches your breasts say "DON'T". And if he touches your pussy say "STOP ??" GIRL : Yes mum, but he touched both, so I told him DON'T STOP!!!!" ================================== GIRLS' REACTION TO COCK SIZES: 8 Inches - Oh Shit,it pains!! 7 Inches - Oh, I'm in heaven 6 Inches - Oh, Perfect... 5 Inches - Ummmmm! Ok! 4 Inches - Push more...!! 3 Inches - Are you there??? 2 Inches - IDIOT!! JUST USE YOUR TONGUE!!! ===================================
December, 2007 My Good Old Upcountry Home. My Good Old Upcountry Home is a place called Kiamwangi Village of Gatundu Division, Thika District, (now Gatundu District) in Central Province, located just about 50 Kilometres North-West of Nairobi City. On a normal day, it would take you approximately between 45 minutes and 1 hour to reach there. This also happens to be the home of our First President of Kenya, the Late Mzee Jomo Kenyatta. Infact, the home of the Former First Lady's (Mama Ngina Kenyatta) mom is a stone-throw away from my parents home.
This is where I was born and brought up by my loving parents in the mid-1960's just after our country's Independence. I will not dwell much on my past though it is as interesting as my present. All the same, it's worth pointing out that I was brought up just like most of my ordinary colleagues, village-mates and average fellow country-men.
Our boyhood life was characterised by farming and herding in our parents' small farms. Very few of our parents had big farms. Our other "exta-normal" activities included making carts, sliding/skidding in mud & cow-dung, swimming and fishing in rivers & murky ponds, hunting small animals & birds using dogs, climbing trees for fun and fruits, stealing eggs & sugar-canes from those farms which had plenty of them, keeping rabbits, gambling using coins & bottle-tops, attending village factual films (cinemas), chasing village girls and orgazising inter-village dances & fights !! We also imitated movie and other stars of the time. You could get a James Bond, Bruce Lee, Clint Eastwood, etc, from my village. However, to attain such status one had to pay very high prices - You had to prove your prowess in several ways which included - having a flock of girls, starting & winning many fights, incitement, jumping from fast moving vehicles, dropping from top of tall trees & tall structures, milking buffalos and such other dare-devil activies only witnessed in Hollywood movies ! You were NOT suppossed to be hurt and if hurt, you were NOT suppossed to cry !! I excelled very well in a number of these activities - and that was a sure way of proving oneself a Hero.....
Anyway, so much for that...and those gone good old days...!!
After my primary, secondary and tertially school careers, I became more of a city-man that a village man.... I lived in hired rooms as a tenant and this is where I first came into contact with that creature named "Landlord". If I were to describe a Landlord to a layman, I would say.......
To be Continued.....
April, 2007 Corrupted Sayings of The Wise... (i) Mtegemea cha nduguye, labda hana dada (Kiswahili)
(ii) Haba na haba, ni haba mbili (Kiswahili)
(iii) Kikulacho, kina meno (Kiswahili)
(iv) Mpanda ngazi, anaenda juu (Kiswahili)
(v) Mpiga ngumi ukuta, ako na "gloves" za chuma (Kiswahili)
(vi) A Friend in need, is a parasite
(vii) A business without a sign, is a sign of no business April, 2007 Essential Legal Authorities Seminar - Nairobi - Mar/April, 2007 On 23rd March, 2007 I received a letter from our Kenya Revenue Authotity headquarters, Times Tower, Nairobi, informing me that I had been selected to attend a Training workshop on World Customs Union - Framework of Standards, The Essential Legal Authorities.
The course was scheduled to take place from 29/4/2007 to 3/7/2007 at The Kenya School of Monetary Studies College, along Thika Road, in Nairobi. I was supposed to stay at the College throughout the course duration since it was residential. At least this sounded good as I really needed a break from the daily routine duties..... and ...the Revenue Targets Monster !!
Thus, came the morning of 29th March, 2007 and I arrived at the College at 7.30am with a suitcase full of my personal effects and some supplies which I needed for my 1-week stay in the College.
......to be continue... How I got My USA Travel Visa. Sometime in January 2007, I got an invitation to attend Workshops on movie acting in Disney-MGM Studios (Orlando), Florida, and Hollywood, (Califonia), USA. The workshops were scheduled to take place in June/July 2007. Thus, in February 2007, I applied for a non-immigrant travel visa as per requirements of the USA Immigration regulations.
This being my first time to apply for an US travel visa and with all the stories I had heard about "numerous" problems my fellow Kenyans faced in obtaining travel visas to America, I was as nervous and restless as anyone could guess. I knew very well that NOBODY whether socially, politically, economically, racial or otherwise connected, is 100% guaranteed a US travel visa However, one thing remained stuck to me.....that is... I was almost very confident that I would get it with or without any external help !!
The interview was scheduled at 9.00am (E.A Time) on 5th April, 2007. So, on the eve of this day, I gathered all the necessary documents, went through them several times one-at-a-go and when I got satisfied that all was in order, I said a pray or two and left everything else to God. That day being a Wednesday popularly baptised in Kenya as "Lady's Nite" I also avoided social joints (bars, restaurants, etc) and headed straight home after work.
On the morning of the D-Day, I woke up at 6.00am (E.A Time), took a shower and dressed in a mid-grey double-cut suit with, a light-coloured shirt, a matching blue dotted tie and black leather shoes. I took some porridge for breakfast and set off for the American Embassy which is situated nearly 20kms from my residence. I drove along Langata Road, then Mbagathi Road, Valley Road, Nyerere Avenue, Uhuru Highway, Forest Road and finally Limuru Road upto UNEP, Gigiri, Nairobi. Traffic was normal and so I was outside American Embassy by 8.20am.
I parked my BMW outside Gigiri Police Station and by 8.40am I was going through the Gate security checks which to my judgement were very normal and professionally conducted. By 8.50am, I handed in my Passport and other relevant documents at one of the Windows designed for that purpose. I was given a "waiting slip" to enable me claim back my passport & other documents. I then joined other people who had also arrived for interviews and other official matters. I judged that there were very many people who had turned up for interviews on that day.
I waited the whole morning but my name was never called. Afternoon session found me thinking that my documents had been misplaced. However, I endured the waiting until around 4.30pm when my name was finally called....!! I was summoned to Window No.9 and a very intelligent-looking lady took me through a 3-minute interview. Within that short time, I was able to demonstrate much of what was required of me and the lady happily told me that I had qualified for the VISA. I gave her a big, loud Thank You and the people who were still waiting to be attended to burst into praise and laughter. They congratulated and praised me for the way I conducted myself and best of all, my CONFIDENCE !! Some even followed me to ask me how I had easily made it while they had tried more than FIVE times without any luck. I told them that there was NO secret - But, to succeed in most things, one has to be confident, organised, sincere (Speak Truth) and courageous.
Thus, as I make the final touches for my much anticipated trip to USA, I advise all those going for US travel visas to have CONFIDENCE, be ORGANISED and be TRUTHFUL. I did not find any complications or strange requirements in the whole process. Despite the long wait, which I suspected was due to the large number of interviewees, everythings else was very normal according to my observation.
........ Much Thanks To The Lady who Interviewed me............
.........Much Thanks To American Embassy.............................
.........Much Thanks To Those Who Cheered me up................
LONG LIVE AMERICA.....!!!!
By: Jimmy Wayuni
Nairobi, KENYA.
February, 2007 Commercial Love.... Sometime ago, a friend of mine introduced me to a very cute-looking young lady named Wanjiru. I saved her phone number in my phonebook and forgot all about it.
One year later, as I was busy deleting the less-important contacts from my phonebook, I came across Wanjiru's name. I decided to call and check whom she was lest I erased an important contact.
So I called her and she reminded me whom she was. She even offered to meet me anytime anywhere in Nairobi in case I had forgotten how she looked like !! This sounded too tempting and we fixed a casual evening date at the Kengeles joint in Nairobi West, along Langata Road.
She surely turned up for the date and I was surprised at how tall and beautiful she had grown. She also said some pleasing compliments about my physique before we settled for some drinks, light meals and lively talks. We later parted late in the night and she took a taxi, which I willingly paid for and I drove to my Langata home. I did'nt get to know much about her social and career life since she just told me that she was putting up with her parents at Madaraka Estate, Nairobi.
Two days later, Wanjiru called me and and after commending me on my hospitality during our previous meeting, requested if I could bail her out of a "small teething" financial problem... I offered to meet her at the same Kengeles joint to discuss the issue further. She was very punctual and and she explained to me that she just needed some Kshs.3,000/- (US$45.00) to pay back a friend who was pestering her with a debt Wanjiru owed her. I found it genuine and gave her the money with no strings attached...
The following day and very many more days to follow, Wanjiru made a habit of flashing to my phone and requesting me for top-up phone credits. I did'nt find this very strange but things took a different turn when she asked me lend her some money to enable her start a Video Library business. I asked her how much she required from me and she replied..."Kshs.100,000/- (approx. US$1,450.00)."
I frankly told her that I could not lend her such amount of money since I was also engaged in some development projects which required alot of financing. This made Wanjiru to reveal her true character. SHE OPENLY OFFERED TO SLEEP WITH ME IN EXCHANGE FOR THIS MONEY !! I turned down her offer and frankly told her that I would NEVER engage in such practises. She made more offers and asked me HOW MUCH I WAS PREPARED TO PART WITH EVERY TIME WE SPENT A NIGHT....!! She even suggested that I give her Kshs.20,000/- (US$300.00)any time we spent a night making love.
I however rejected her advances and offers and even told her that I was very ready to help her WITHOUT NECESSARILY having to sleep with her, only that I was abit more occupied with my projects. I started avoiding her conversation and meetings since she was very persuasive and I was sensing trouble. This appeared to have hit her impatience, fury and temper... Weh!! weh!! weh...!!
Then one night, Hell broke loose....!! My phone was jammed with over 1,000 very dirty-sounding, abusive and harsh messages from Wanjiru !! She called me all the shit you could think of in this planet... The things she called me are too dirty, obscene,shameful and hard to publish here...!! She only fell short of calling me her own private parts !! All this was because I had proved hard to part with my money. I clearly told that I now knew her True Colours...And that even if she called me The Intestines of A Pig, I would NOT part with a single coin for sex...!! This infuriated her more and she let out more venom... It took me two days to erase all her messages which had literally jammed my phone. I could neither make/receive calls nor send/receive messages till I had cleared all of Wanjiru's (SMS's) insults. A big number of them went unread.
One thing had come out openly - That Wanjiru was no longer the young, cute innocent-looking lady my good friend had introduced me to, BUT a professional die-hard commercial sex worker (City Harlot)!!
I always say am lucky I detected it rather in good time, or would you say...AT the right time ?? I erased her phone numbers and wished I had done so earlier...All the same, it was quite an experience...!! Today I refer to her as "Wanjiru wa Ngiri Igana..." (ie: Wanjiru of Kshs.100,000/-)
By: Jimmy Wayuni,
Nairobi,
KENYA.
January, 2007 The Boxer's Umbrella... One day, a boxer left his valuable umbrella outside a stadium toilet with a warning note which read, "Warning: Don't touch it !! It belongs to a World Heavyweight Boxer !!"
On return, he found the umbrella missing and a note that read, " Sorry, your umbrella has been stolen by a World Marathon Champion. You'll never catch me.... !!"
By: Jimmy Wayuni,
Nairobi.
KENYA.
October, 2006 The Standard Chartered Bank World Marathon - Year 2006.
This famous event took place in my country, Kenya, on Sunday the 29th October,2006. Though am generally good in various sporting activities, I had no prior plans for this event. However, my official duties as a Customs officer drove me right into it.
It all started when I helped in clearance of some imported goods which were to be used in this event. The goods had been held at African Cargo Handling Centre, Jomo Kenyatta Int. Airport pending some Customs formalities. Being a Saturday, the goods were already desperately needed at the event's venue!! This way, I met one M/s Patricia of Standard Chartered Bank, Nairobi, whom I released the goods to. She had been introduced to me by Mr. Howard of DHL, Kenya. She offered me 2 complimentary tickets - one for my car's parking at Nyayo Sports Stadium, Nairobi and the other which gave me access to "All Areas"....
Came Sunday morning 6.30am, I dressed in a nice sports gear (t-shirt, shorts & shoes) I had brought from Thailand and headed for the Stadium. There were nearly 16,000 participants...!! At 7.30am, we were flagged off......and the race was on......!! We ran, jogged, walked, joked, laughed.. and RAN...!! It was very gruelling, though exciting. A lovely looking lady whose pace matched mine kept encouranging me to carry on each time I appeared to give in. I in-turn kept admiring her brown well-shaped legs which were "all too bare" from her nice sporting shorts. She looked composed, respectable, respectful and responsible. However, the last I saw of her was when we were entering the Stadium towards the Finishing line. There were two queues - one for women runners and the other one for men runners. When I joined our queue and she joined hers, we lost each other....!! Worse of ALL we had not exchanged contacts nor formally been introduced...!! What a Loss...!!..??
Anyway, the good news is that I finished the race in one piece and within the "acceptable time limit". Even though I was nowhere near the "Winners' List", I got Finisher's Medal and I was proud of it. Afterall, the exercise was actually good for my health. And I had nothing to lose anyway, save for the....respectful brown well-shaped-legged Lady !!
My Wayuni Music Makers Int. Media crew of Mr. Saimo (Video Cameraman) and Mr. Stephen Njuguna (Digital Cameraman) were around and caught some memorable moments..... (See Photos)
By: jimmy wayuni
Nairobi, Kenya.
October, 2006 | |||||||||||||||||||||||||||
Invite as friend
Profile
Blog
Guestbook
Photos
Lists
Music
Files
